Had a pretty good week after a not so fabulous week... JOURNAL, JOURNAL, JOURNAL!!
Weeks OP: 116
Weight: 198.6
Loss/Gain: -0.2
TOTAL Loss: 76.4
Pounds to Goal: 53.7
Saturday, April 23, 2005
Saturday, April 9, 2005
WEIGH-IN: 114 WEEKS OP
One step forward, two steps back! UGH!
Here... let's have a little chat...
Weeks OP: 114
Weight: 198.8
Loss/Gain: +2.8
TOTAL Loss: 76.2
Pounds to Goal: 53.9
Here... let's have a little chat...
Weeks OP: 114
Weight: 198.8
Loss/Gain: +2.8
TOTAL Loss: 76.2
Pounds to Goal: 53.9
Okay... what's been going on w/ me???
I'd like to know that as well!
I hate to go to those weight loss websites that have either been abandoned months or years ago... or that are so miserable to read because the person is dark & depressed... failing miserably.
Well... I don't want have either kind of website. I want to continue to be an inspiration to those who somehow stumble across my site or have just come back to see how I'm doing... so here I am! :o)
Anyways... One POSITIVE thing I can say is that I'm still going on... not necessarily MOVING FORWARD :o) ... but I haven't given up. At this point I know that's never going to happen.
After my last WI where I felt like I was back on track, I had a few really crazy weeks. I let life get in the way... let my safeguards down (regular weigh-ins, journaling EVERYTHING, wearing JEANS frequently, etc...) I knew what I was doing, but I didn't want to take the time to care...
I know better.
I missed 2 weeks of meetings, didn't find the time to exercise & enjoyed way too many sweets & all sorts of crap. By the time all was said & done, it was really obvious that I had gained a bit of weight. Because I was working alot, I wasn't wearing my jeans... just loose skirts & dress pants. When I FINALLY took the time to try my jeans on, they were so tight... there was a good 3 inches of "space" (to put it nicely) between both sides of the snap! (LOL!) THAT was just the REALITY CHECK I needed... good slap upside the head.
I was going to miss 2 more meetings as we were leaving town for Spring Break, but I knew that I was going to get it back together IMMEDIATELY & that it was time to stop playing games. I wasn't winning, that's for sure!!
Anyways... I packed up those jeans, headed to my parents' place in Colorado & spent a full week COMPLETELY committed to a SUGAR FREE lifestyle. Not an easy thing to do in my mother's house! :o) I weighed myself when I got to my parents' house... I LIKE their scale... it HAD to be weighing AT LEAST 5 to 10 lbs light, so I was still under 200 (although I know I really was way above it). By the end of the week I had dropped FIVE lbs!!! I was so proud of myself!! I had my PDA w/ me & journaled EVERYTHING (using WW's On-the-Go PDA journaling program... LOVE IT!) Walked the mall w/ my parents... walked the neighborhood w/ my DH & played w/ the kids. Mid-week I could get the jeans buttoned... by the end of the week they zipped!! Yeah Me!!! :o) It was a great week!
I came home sick & didn't get a whole heck of alot of exercise in for the week, but I still did well OP... journaled EVERYTHING & was VERY happy to come away w/ only a 2.8 lb gain at my meeting this morning. I could tell that I was close to being where I was a month ago... I DEFINITELY gain weight around my waist... I could SEE it a few weeks ago... UGH... I felt MISERABLE... FAT... DEPRESSED... YUCK.
I don't like that feeling. I'm going to remember it. Makes me realize that I will NEVER gain all my weight back ... NEVER. It's too depressing. I'm too "in touch" w/ my body now. I might gain 5 - 10 lbs, but I'll KNOW IT & I'll be quick to do something about it. I'll keep those safeguards in place to keep me completely aware of what my body is doing. (regular weigh-ins, wear jeans, get rid of & NEVER buy a larger size, etc...)
Something that I realized when I was driving to Colorado was that this little "dance" that I've been doing... 2 lb gain, 1 lb loss, 5 lb gain, etc... it hasn't really been a "little" dance at all. I hadn't really thought about it, but I was sitting AT LEAST 15 - 20 above my lowest weight of 185.6 from September of last year... TWENTY POUNDS!! That's ALOT! Feels like it CREPT up on me & yeah, I suppose it did... but I'm not supposed to let weight creep up on me like that... EVER! Not going to happen again... I can tell you that.
Anyways... just thought I should write a little bit to let you guys know what's going on. Life isn't dark & depressing, yeah God, not quite perfect, but I'm still here & feeling good about that little fact. I hope that for you, my little reality check will make you see that NO, this isn't as easy as I thought, but that I am more than willing to work through the process, no matter what twists & turns I take & that I'm NEVER GIVING UP!
There was a lady at my meeting today who got her 5 lb bookmark... she was a "rejoiner", saying that she had joined & given up many times, but that this was the first time she actually made it to 5 lbs. She said that she always got frustrated that the weight wasn't coming off faster & that she was even feeling a bit like that THIS TIME. It took her several weeks to get to the 5 lb mark. I wanted to talk to her after class but she took off quickly. I wanted to ask her to look at all of the times that she gave up because it was going too slow & realize that even if it came off excruciatingly slow... over months or years... that if she had just stuck w/ it she would've been at goal by now.
THAT is my way of thinking. Yeah... sometimes a little too laid back... I know it's keeping me from moving forward like I should be ... but I know that by thinking this way, I won't give up. I'll get there... someday. :o)
Yeah, sooner than later would be nice... but I'll get there.
Okay... that's enough, don't you think??? :o)
Thanks for listening.
Julie
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh yeah, BTW... I brought my wedding dress home w/ me from my parents' house... my current goal is to fit into it by the end of the summer. I was around 170 when I was married almost 16 years ago. I need to try it on now, haven't done that... it'll be cool to try it on from time to time to see what progress I've made throughout the summer. Will keep you updated on the progress.
I hate to go to those weight loss websites that have either been abandoned months or years ago... or that are so miserable to read because the person is dark & depressed... failing miserably.
Well... I don't want have either kind of website. I want to continue to be an inspiration to those who somehow stumble across my site or have just come back to see how I'm doing... so here I am! :o)
Anyways... One POSITIVE thing I can say is that I'm still going on... not necessarily MOVING FORWARD :o) ... but I haven't given up. At this point I know that's never going to happen.
After my last WI where I felt like I was back on track, I had a few really crazy weeks. I let life get in the way... let my safeguards down (regular weigh-ins, journaling EVERYTHING, wearing JEANS frequently, etc...) I knew what I was doing, but I didn't want to take the time to care...
I know better.
I missed 2 weeks of meetings, didn't find the time to exercise & enjoyed way too many sweets & all sorts of crap. By the time all was said & done, it was really obvious that I had gained a bit of weight. Because I was working alot, I wasn't wearing my jeans... just loose skirts & dress pants. When I FINALLY took the time to try my jeans on, they were so tight... there was a good 3 inches of "space" (to put it nicely) between both sides of the snap! (LOL!) THAT was just the REALITY CHECK I needed... good slap upside the head.
I was going to miss 2 more meetings as we were leaving town for Spring Break, but I knew that I was going to get it back together IMMEDIATELY & that it was time to stop playing games. I wasn't winning, that's for sure!!
Anyways... I packed up those jeans, headed to my parents' place in Colorado & spent a full week COMPLETELY committed to a SUGAR FREE lifestyle. Not an easy thing to do in my mother's house! :o) I weighed myself when I got to my parents' house... I LIKE their scale... it HAD to be weighing AT LEAST 5 to 10 lbs light, so I was still under 200 (although I know I really was way above it). By the end of the week I had dropped FIVE lbs!!! I was so proud of myself!! I had my PDA w/ me & journaled EVERYTHING (using WW's On-the-Go PDA journaling program... LOVE IT!) Walked the mall w/ my parents... walked the neighborhood w/ my DH & played w/ the kids. Mid-week I could get the jeans buttoned... by the end of the week they zipped!! Yeah Me!!! :o) It was a great week!
I came home sick & didn't get a whole heck of alot of exercise in for the week, but I still did well OP... journaled EVERYTHING & was VERY happy to come away w/ only a 2.8 lb gain at my meeting this morning. I could tell that I was close to being where I was a month ago... I DEFINITELY gain weight around my waist... I could SEE it a few weeks ago... UGH... I felt MISERABLE... FAT... DEPRESSED... YUCK.
I don't like that feeling. I'm going to remember it. Makes me realize that I will NEVER gain all my weight back ... NEVER. It's too depressing. I'm too "in touch" w/ my body now. I might gain 5 - 10 lbs, but I'll KNOW IT & I'll be quick to do something about it. I'll keep those safeguards in place to keep me completely aware of what my body is doing. (regular weigh-ins, wear jeans, get rid of & NEVER buy a larger size, etc...)
Something that I realized when I was driving to Colorado was that this little "dance" that I've been doing... 2 lb gain, 1 lb loss, 5 lb gain, etc... it hasn't really been a "little" dance at all. I hadn't really thought about it, but I was sitting AT LEAST 15 - 20 above my lowest weight of 185.6 from September of last year... TWENTY POUNDS!! That's ALOT! Feels like it CREPT up on me & yeah, I suppose it did... but I'm not supposed to let weight creep up on me like that... EVER! Not going to happen again... I can tell you that.
Anyways... just thought I should write a little bit to let you guys know what's going on. Life isn't dark & depressing, yeah God, not quite perfect, but I'm still here & feeling good about that little fact. I hope that for you, my little reality check will make you see that NO, this isn't as easy as I thought, but that I am more than willing to work through the process, no matter what twists & turns I take & that I'm NEVER GIVING UP!
There was a lady at my meeting today who got her 5 lb bookmark... she was a "rejoiner", saying that she had joined & given up many times, but that this was the first time she actually made it to 5 lbs. She said that she always got frustrated that the weight wasn't coming off faster & that she was even feeling a bit like that THIS TIME. It took her several weeks to get to the 5 lb mark. I wanted to talk to her after class but she took off quickly. I wanted to ask her to look at all of the times that she gave up because it was going too slow & realize that even if it came off excruciatingly slow... over months or years... that if she had just stuck w/ it she would've been at goal by now.
THAT is my way of thinking. Yeah... sometimes a little too laid back... I know it's keeping me from moving forward like I should be ... but I know that by thinking this way, I won't give up. I'll get there... someday. :o)
Yeah, sooner than later would be nice... but I'll get there.
Okay... that's enough, don't you think??? :o)
Thanks for listening.
Julie
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh yeah, BTW... I brought my wedding dress home w/ me from my parents' house... my current goal is to fit into it by the end of the summer. I was around 170 when I was married almost 16 years ago. I need to try it on now, haven't done that... it'll be cool to try it on from time to time to see what progress I've made throughout the summer. Will keep you updated on the progress.
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